The vicious circle of bribing

I’ve had some juggles with Valeria lately. I’ll admit it… it’s not her… it’s totally me. Mostly because I’m trying to fit my pregnant life style going on 25 weeks meaning I’m

“tryyyyyying to spend as little energy as possible running after her”

as apparently it

“takes a lot of energy producing another daughter in my belly” (keep forgetting this).

This kind of conflicts with Valeria’s lifestyle “I’m now 13 months old, have been walking since 9 months so I’m going to start running and will complain if you put me in the stroller”.

I have to say, I don’t doubt her. As frustrated as she was NOT being able to walk already at 5 months I now wish her all the running in the world! So, as you might understand this means we have very different goals at the moment. Which leads to her not wanting to sit in the stroller for that long and for me wanting her to sit in the stroller for very long…

…so going somewhere has been a “bribing kind of show”. As in from the moment we’ve stepped outside… giving her something to eat until she gets tired of that after 10 min and then just complains for the rest of the way.

BUT I’ve seen the light now! A friend of mine recommended me to switch the stroller seat so she faces me again and knock on wood but so far it’s been working. I still bribe her but to a much less extent! 

Woopeliwoo!!!!

 

 

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Awesome weekend

We had such an ultra delux prepped chilled weekend! Brace yourselves, this will be a long post...

Bags were packed in time (who am I kidding, packed last minute), snacks had been purchased (on the way to the airport), Valeria had been hyped that we were travelling (actually forgot to but kind of told her on the way to the airport).

Oh and did I mention that hubby landed 3 hours before our flight from his work trip. He had been on a flight for 15+ hours and was kind of jet lagged so we kind of had the “perfect” energy (after my night where Valeria woke up every hour of the night) that’s required to fly with a one year old.   

....so we started our time at the airport with a coffee. AND after various games and imaginative ways to entertain our daughter on the flight we high fived each other in the rental car for not having snapped at each other, thinking we’re starting to get good at this. 

Favourite parts of the weekend

...had some super duper chill time at a spa hubby and I where we caught up on some hours of sleep. Feeling amazingly greatfull for family that helps us a lot and this time peters sister and her family who took care of Valeria 🙌

…met with some awesome friends whom I haven’t seen for a while and solved world problems.

…ate lots of good food

...chillidilled  

...slept

...ate more good food... 

kind of sums it all 🙌 

BRING IT ON MONDAY!

 

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I own horses

..not the living breathing kind but they are indeed racing ones.

I’m talking about the horses in a game you usually see at an amusement park. That game where you have to roll a ball into a hole for your horse to move forward. First horse across the finish line wins.

In my mind, this is the game I play. To me each horse represents a part of my company. Something I have to do. And they all have to reach the finish line. Product development, market research, brand building, finding producers, logistics, admin stuff, sales….. All of the horses have to reach the finish line. I won’t always be able to move all of them at the same time but if one of them is stuck for any reason I can be on alert and move some of the others in the meantime. It gives me an overview, a mental picture of how to prioritize. Not all horses are worth moving. Some horses have to get to the finish line first but are slower, and some will be faster at getting there once the first ones have finished.

My horses are how I see my life, how I see the things that need to move forward, my to do list, my motivation and reminder to keep going because eventually they will reach the finish line. Even when it doesn’t feel like things are moving forward, they are. It’s just one of the horses in the back moving forward. So although it doesn’t look like the front horse is getting closer to the finish line they will all cross eventually.

Earlier this week when I definitely was doing some heavy thinking about what horse to move forward……

My super ultra delux day

I’ll be honest….I don’t remember what I did this morning…hmmm…what did I actually do this morning…

Was thinking about the day, whilst putting Valeria to bed. I mean, whilst we were watching “night night circus”. Youtube it if you haven’t seen it. It’s my new favorite clip, has to be every parents favorite one. Watch it every night before I put her in her bed. She calms down, I fall asleep for a bit whilst trying to figure out what I did in the morning. CAN’T get any better than that.

Remember now, cleaner was here. Not any cleaner, but my life savior cleaner. Yup, we have a cleaner. We’re one of those couples who’ve always had a cleaner. Ok, ok, maybe not the first year of our relationship (12 years ago). But quickly when we realized our flat completely started falling apart, we got a cleaner. You who know me KNOW that when we say there’s a mess in our house, there truly is a mess. Okay, not that bad any more because we have a cleaner, but before, you wouldn’t be able to see the floor, nor use any of the dishes because they were all dirty. When it comes to cleaning both of our boundaries are pretty low. This is one of those things I thought was going to get better when we had our daughter but no…. I guess it’s because we both really despise doing it and therefore refuse doing it. Don’t get me wrong, we both love when it’s clean, hence our solution!

Anyhow, that totally spun out of hand, I mean my day was so super ultra interesting so I’m actually dying to write about it.

Here we go…..

….cleaner came, I took Valeria to a playground, I had to pee, went home, went out again for a walk with Valeria in the stroller, I got tired from walking (after 30 min, I’m really pregnant now..haha), had to pee again, realized cooking was overrated today, bought food at Italian deli, went home, had lunch, Valeria slept, I slept after working a bit, Valeria woke up, I woke up, I had coffee and made banana pancakes for her and an “ultra delux banana with quark, peanut butter and cinnamon burrito” kind of snack for me, I told Valeria lets go to “open pre-school” and got her dressed, we went out, we got to the tube station and I realized we were too short on time to make it, went to pick up package instead, realized there it’s not due until tomorrow, went home, made taco meatballs, read books and watched youtube, had evening snack, then put her to bed and now HERE I AM!

…did you follow me there…it’s totally fine if you didn’t….here are some pictures instead :D

That famous morning walk!

That famous morning walk!

I’d like to think she was wraaaing like a tiger here, but really she was just wining a bit.

I’d like to think she was wraaaing like a tiger here, but really she was just wining a bit.

Valeria, my bump and I heading out again. These trousers are by the way the most comfortable and stylish (according to me) that I have at the moment.

Valeria, my bump and I heading out again. These trousers are by the way the most comfortable and stylish (according to me) that I have at the moment.

Wish I was this easily entertained…playing with keys…maybe I should give it a go and it will surprise me…

Wish I was this easily entertained…playing with keys…maybe I should give it a go and it will surprise me…

Thoughts so far on starting my own company

...I think I’m over the part where it feels like I’ve jumped of a cliff...oh wait, actually it still pops up every now and then. Like now for example...

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...Im loving entering a new branch. Got this realisation after my first product meeting. It hit me that I’m so used to having product meetings with finance or data people. It was liberating having one that felt more creative!

...I have an awesome todo list that I work on...as soon as I get a moment...like now...my todo list is key for my mushy pregnant brain

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...bring on the mistakes! In any project I’ve done there have always been unforeseen things happening. The earlier I get them, the earlier I can fix them and move on. 

...importance of bouncing ideas with others and surrounding myself with people in the same mood. If you’re in a similar situation, would love to talk more!

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...at the same time I feel extremely impatient as I feel like I have gotten nowhere. But reminding myself that it takes time, be persistent and continue to push all ends. I’m doing this at the same time as being pregnant, taking care of our daughter, and organising something else big. So have to remind myself to give myself a break and think long term. (Although this feels like excuses, have to work on that)

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...I’m a result fanatic so want to see results now now now. Let’s kick ass this week!!!

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Lazy Sunday

You know those days when everything just fits perfectly! You literally feel like you can take over the world!

THAT was my morning! Got to sleep in an extra hour, went to a playground and took some nice photos, discovered I’d matched Valeria’s sweater with the leaves, took some more beautiful pictures, (I mean who doesn’t want to match their clothes to the seasons...), made an awesome pasta that we both loved despite the feta cheese being a bit too old (still tasted ok).... 

....then came the afternoon...the dip... the legendary downhill...the awesomest laziest Sunday - THEEE LAZY SUNDAY. Didn’t do shit for rest of the day and even the dinner was shit (Valeria threw it in the floor and I have to admit I wanted to as well...haha) so now treating you with the nice pictures from this morning 😂  

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Matching the leaves 🍁 

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Stole someone else’s toy!

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Rest of the day!  

Do you ever do things alone?

I do. Even went on holiday by myself a couple of years ago. Although I’m never alone these days with my bump V2  

Hence today’s mood

...felt keen on having a typical Saturday breakfast out

...found a new place I haven’t tried

...had a babysitter so I could enjoy it by myself. (Husband still travelling) 

 ...because I’m by myself I got a table right away

...the table happened to be a chair at another table with 5 Finnish speaking girls  

...the 5 Finnish speaking girls must have thought I was a pregnant person

...I couldn’t care less the place looked amazing! 

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 ...food was amazing

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...listened to an awesome podcast to entertain myself and wrote majority of this post.  “Framgångspodden”

...had a good start to the day

...decided to find another cafe to try out afterwards and get some work done. One with power outlets (my computer dies otherwise) 

...went shopping instead, I was on a role and found some styles for my bump. Comfy and classy I’d like to call it (although my fashion interest is limited and I want to be comfortable, I still want to look good) 

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A new benefit of being pregnant...

I’m becoming incredibly forgetful. To the point that my previous superpower skills do not work any more. I had the superpower to see where my husband put is phone, keys or wallet to save us time for when we’re exiting the house.

“Your wallet is under the book that’s to the left of the sofa on the floor underneath that sqooshi toy” type of superpower.

I know…. he should be able to keep a track on these things himself but that’s just one of the strengths and weaknesses where we complete each other so deal with it.

Well… now this superpower has disappeared… and I’m even finding it hard to keep track of my own phone, keys and wallet. Luckily I have a wallet case for my phone so if I find the phone I find the wallet.

BUT today this served me good - this afternoon our babysitter texted me to ask if she could come earlier as she finished class already. I HAD COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN she was coming today! So not only was I happy she was, but ALSO that she could come earlier :) I had mentally prepared myself for not getting anything done today….

…So…a new benefit of being pregnant…you get some good surprises during the day :D Win Win!

Haven’t forgotten about this really nice spa where I was at last Saturday! This is the “cold bath pool”. I definitely didn’t go in that one 😂 

Haven’t forgotten about this really nice spa where I was at last Saturday! This is the “cold bath pool”. I definitely didn’t go in that one 😂 

The honest ups and downs today

Yup - it’s one of those days - one of those days when I’m not quite feeling it, one of those days when it feels like I’m not getting anything done. I know I am, but it’s slow, feel impatient. But have to remember it’s long-term, long-term, long-term - all about priorities with life and company.

The honest ups

  • Had a really good meeting last Friday with Röda Tråden who are helping me produce my first samples of the nursing bras.

  • Got connected a while ago with another awesome person Angelique Fihn who also has her own lingerie company Angelique Fihn Lingerie. We’re like yin and yang so the last couple of weeks we’re bouncing ideas and helping each other - truly awesome! Check out her awesome instagram page angeliquefihn_lingerie AND she’s about to release a kickstarter…

  • Valeria only naps once a day now and still falls asleep for the full night between 7-8pm (truly greatful for this - other mums, you know what I’m talking about)

  • A big change is coming which I’m really looking forward to. Will tell you more when I have more info.

  • I’m truly grateful I did grocery shopping online yesterday that’s coming already this evening. No need to carry anything - woop woop!

The honest downs

  • Started getting pain in my pelvis from the pregnancy (23 weeks now)

  • Valeria is incredibly unhappy in the stroller at the moment - and since I’m to tired to run after her it feels limiting what we do now during the day (any tips?)

  • Husband is away for maybe 1-2 weeks. Stuff has to get done so we pepp each other but sometimes it just feels shitty. I mentioned I’m addicted to him…

  • A LOT of admin with “the big change” and trying to combine it with building my company is NOT the easiest. Specially now that my babysitter started studying and has limited time to help out.

This day definitely needs some puns! Here we go…

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Plan for the week

My sister in law asked me yesterday what plans I have this week. Realized I got a bit startled. I looooved to plan my weeks before. Filled out my calendar with everything from work stuff, dates with friends to different workouts I was going to.

I’ve laid that off….

….but been unaware of it…

....and still love it... 

…so when she asked me I actually got a bit startled realizing I didn’t have anything planned. I wing it a little bit too much these days. So I made some stuff up. Or didn’t exactly make it up but rather mentioned stuff that’s not really plans. Like eating breakfast by myself is a plan… I think you get my point.

So here I am - trying to sort out my week and fill it with lots of stuff. Also because husband is away and therefore want week to go quick and what’s a better way than to plan things.

So here we go - plans for the week

  • To do as many activities as possible so that it will be enjoyable and be quick as I’m by myself with Valeria. Already managed to squeeze in two play-dates and work today - woop woop!

  • Actually do my pregnancy work outs - my body is retiring…it’s not even fun. As I’m entering week 23 it’s completely starting to feel like I’m living in a very old persons body.

  • Finish company budget - have a basic one but need to get this one done.

  • Order food online - will help with the second bullet point - goal is to carry as little as possible and online grossery shopping is amazing for that.

     

    Now let’s get this baby bump out of the sofa... 

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What type of packer are you?

After my last flight I came to think of packing. Such an interesting topic right? I mean packing your luggage, unpacking luggage, how much do you bring etc etc disregard if it’s travelling with work or for leisure. 

  • The “packs their luggage in time” person. Packs a week ahead of the trip. Usually has coordinated everything down to outfits assigned to each day and everything is neatly placed in the suitcase. Unpacks the same day as they get back, does laundry and there will be no trace of any travelling having been done within 3 hours of arriving back home again. 
  • The “packs 3 days a head”person. Usually checks in their suit case because they have had time to add things to their suitcase everyday before travelling. So it ends up being a big bag instead of hand luggage. Brings extra outfits in case one changes their minds about what to wear. Takes them the same amount of time to unpack when they arrive home.
  • The “Packs the evening before” person. Only in rare cases does this person check in their bag. (As in if they’re forced to by the gate) 
  • The  “Packs the same morning” person. Usually manages to get some things in there but also usually not. This person rarely unpacks at all as she/he is a frequent traveller. 

What kind of packer are you? and which one do you think I am? 

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When things don’t go as planned

Ok, I was totally gonna write and post yesterday. A really funny one... A really funny one that actually makes you laugh... A really funny one that actually makes you laugh and gives you something to think about...A really funny one that actually makes you laugh, gives you something to think about AND gives you a ahaaaa moment...

You get my point...not hyping this at all...haha

But! it was one of those days when I just couldn’t get it together. A good friend reminded me at lunch time to “only do what’s necessary”. So switched to that mood. Which meant not writing.  Unfortunately as I do kind of enjoy that (in case you haven’t noticed).  

Wanted to show you a picture of what this looks like but kind of hard to capture the moment so throwing you a nice pun instead  

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Time to Fly again....

Or actually now we already have flown. Never had time to post this before the flight 😂 so I’ve added how it really went in cursive after each bullet point 

The does and don’ts have changed since last time:

  • she’s now 13 months, fully mobile and running around like crazy  (managed to keep her in the stroller through not having that much time before the flight and bribing her with food)
  • bribing with snacks is a big YES! if I want her to stay in the stroller and not run around after her.  (Yup did this)
proof of bribe 

proof of bribe 

  • flying in the evening is a big no, unless they dim the lights, in which she falls asleep immediately.  (Didn’t fall asleep this flight either, luckily it was a short one)

  • Babblarna or other youtube videos downloaded offline are also a big YES! unless I want her to wriggle down on the floor and say hi to everyone’s feet. Could be fun too but not stretching it…  (babblarna did NOT work this time. Luckily I had some other stuff downloaded which did)

I suspect this is one of the last flights alone with her myself…..my belly is growing….there’s no room for her soon to sit in my lap….  (Confirmed - this was last time! My belly was a little bit too much in the way...haha)

Entertainment in action. Safety card is also a big hit. Me = feeling squashed by baby externally and internally. 

Entertainment in action. Safety card is also a big hit. Me = feeling squashed by baby externally and internally. 

Wish us luck!  (Overall went really well, although def exhausted now! There’s a big difference now flying with her. She’s not a toddler anymore but feels more like a little person who will listen to stories etc)

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Bus to the gate

 

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Entertainment whilst waiting for bag.  

Current Parental Hacks

  • Putting a plastic carpet underneath her chair in the kitchen. One of those you normally use under office chairs to make them roll better. Result = so much easier to clean underneath when she consistently keeps dropping food. Thank you sister-in-law for that tip!

  • Playground that has fences. Disregard how little the opening is to the entrance of the playground my daughter wants to run out if it's not closed.

  • Babysitter in the day rather than the evening. I for one am so tired in the evenings any way. So if I go out for dinner it’s a snooze party.

  • Do not make any decisions before I had my morning coffee…I tend to get super emotional and things seem a lot tougher to do without it. Life savior!

  • “Good enough” is ringing in my ear right now - something that I funnily enough despised before because I was always going to be the best! Delivery pizza for lunch? Yes please make it 2!

  • Think - what would I do today if I was alone?…to get ideas of what to do…then modify (as going to a spa might not be the most suitable place for a one year old) and just do it. Most of the times for me currently it’s going to “open pre-school” which is a hang out place for other parents and kids. You can talk to people (or be quiet if you prefer) and your kid can run around and play with toys they don’t normally see. What my daughter did last time? Was obsessed with going up and down the stairs to the slide, no going down the slide, just up and down the slide…..for hours…..

  • Make funny pictures on the phone - although she still seems grumpy sometimes at least she seems interested…haha

  • Taught her how to eat food cold, so I don’t have to heat it up every time.

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Who eats the violet licorice?

We have to talk about something

What type of person actually likes the licorice in “Salt och Blandat” that has a taste of violet?

  • Those pieces that always seem to be the majority in the bag…

  • Those three edged pieces that I’ve accidentally eaten too many times…

  • The ones that I always save until last and then when I’m desperate enough actually finish them….

Who are you?

I imagine that you wear glasses, eat tacos on Friday evenings and wear black in the winter (or majority of the year). I don’t think you’re a vegetarian but you tell people you are and you probably work out about 6-7 times a week.

It’s Friday Evening….. I’m bored….who ARE YOU?

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Living in a collective

I’ve always suspected it. I blame my childhood for it (growing up in a big family with 4 brothers).

...I would love to live in a collective. (Darling, my husband, you know this already and agree with me) 

But imagine the following

  • there’s always someone you can talk to (or be quiet with) when you get home from a long day. Someone will always be in the mood for a chat (or be quiet)
  • There’s always someone to cook food with, or eat dessert with, or late night snack with, or have wine with (ok I’m getting carried away now, I know)
  • There’s always someone that can watch your baby when you have to run out and get something in the store, or go to the gym (that would be amazing!)
  •  There’s always someone you can borrow clothes from. Unless they’re not the same size as you, which often is the case for me now being pregnant. But at least you can influence their choice of warderobe and tell them to get really stretchy clothes then so that they can fit you too. 
  • There’s always someone that cares about it being tidy so you will care about it too just enough to do the dishes that late evening. Or just arrange a cleaner once a week (if you hate cleaning like I do) 

Anyone else?  

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Newly found superpower skills...

Realized that becoming a parent has given me some new superpower skills.

  • Super ultra strong - Increased my shoulder strength - I can definitely lift heavier weights at the gym these days

  • Super ultra awareness - Be on constant alert if she decides to jump down the sofa, stairs or any other height that she has yet to learn.

  • Super ultra rechargeable- Being able to reset my mental to-do list or daily targets - I thought I had learned how to do this from my previous job (where priorities constantly changed) but little did I know…

  • Super ultra idea generator - Brainstorm and come up with ideas like crazy - if you’ve had a toddler on a plane for more than 3 hours (actually let me rephrase that to 1 hour) in a row you know what I’m talking about.

Valeria’s superpower skill is definitely being able to eat at the same time as sucking her thumb. They call it comfort food for a reason….hahaha

Valeria’s superpower skill is definitely being able to eat at the same time as sucking her thumb. They call it comfort food for a reason….hahaha

Clothes

...hanging around (pun definitely intended). What should I do with them? Realising more and more that  

  1. most of my clothes don’t fit me at the moment so there’s no point in keeping them in my warderobe.  
  2. Sorting them out is definitely an option but are they even worth saving? will I even wear them again?
  3. it took me about 6 months to get into them again after the first pregnancy
  4. at which time I realised that most of my clothes were work related and not very suitable or comfortable to sit on floors (entertaining the baby) in...
  5. and that most of them will be out of fashion by the next time they will fit me...
  6. and I don’t even think they will be appropriate for the climate I’m planning on living in then...

Who wants some clothes?!!!! 

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a less successful attempt ordering some maternity clothes from Asos. 

Learnings from birthday parties

We’ve had a weekend filled with birthday parties. Both Saturday and Sunday. It’s been....lets call it interesting.

Interesting as in when you use it in the English language for when something isn’t interesting at all but rather catastrophic! Not like when you use it in the Swedish language and actually mean that it’s interesting. 

Learnings

  • Valeria will not sleep at all during days like these. 
  • Drink an extra cup of coffee as Valeria will not sleep at all during those days
  • other kids at parties are amazing because the effect of “acting as a herd”  kicks in and they all run around following each other.
  • I will not disturb my daughter when she’s in the “acting as a herd” mood. She wants to be left alone and continuously walk up and down stairs if there are any. If disturbed she will throw herself backwards and scream without any thought that she will hit the floor.
  • Did I mention she didn’t sleep at all during these days... 

 

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Best part of the weekend, when my husband made me a sandwich. Mostly cause I would eat his otherwise but any ways :) 

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My bump is starting to be useful finally 😂🙌 

Bad Mum or Superwoman?

You know when you read or hear something and it just feels like the biggest epiphany every! Like it was meant to be, like this is what you’ve waited for your whole life (or at least a year) and that you finally feel at home and like things are making sense.

I had this feeling reading the book “Dålig mamma eller superkvinna”. It translates to “Bad mum or superwoman”. Unfortunately only exists in Swedish so far.

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Therese Albrechtson has written the book together with Maria Otterling. Therese compiles her own and other women’s experiences to highlight the challenges that affect women who want to have a career at the same time as having a family.

I’M JUST IN LOVE with it so I will have to share some bits. Maybe it will even be a regular type of post….mohhahahaha!!!!!

Stay tuned - will publish some of my favourite bits the coming days.  

  AND have to say - the interviewed women in the book are all my new role models now and source of inspiration.